My Alien Self: My Journey Back to Me (Memoirs of Amanda Green)

Your story really shed a light on mental illness,depression,anxiety. That's for sharing your story. And for showing that even if you have those or other disorders that there is help,there is support and sources to help and that it's not all hopeless. Just keep fighting and winning.

I have a fascination with the human psyche, and often read memoirs of people whose lives have been shaped or twisted by mental illness. This book tells the story of a woman's journey from a dysfunctional childhood of what must have been a very disturbing conflict of the emotions of fear, shame, happiness, and love, living with a mentally ill parent, to her own freefall into the world of abuse, promiscuity, drugs, alcohol, self-harm, and the diagnosing of her own mental illness. I cringed with the author as she shared details of her life honestly and with candour, that must have been astoundingly hard to put down in a book for all the world to see, and I cheered with her as she used her own intelligence and strong will to fight her demons, to forgive, love, and try to overcome the hand that life had dealt her. This book is the well written, honest, shocking, and also funny and interesting story of one woman's decision to swim and not sink. I loved the tales of her travels around the world also. A talented author with the ability to "take you there". Kudos to Amanda Green for sharing her life story, so others with similar problems can see that there is always hope.

Amanda Greene has a great big generous heart to lay bare the most cringeworthy moments of her life to heal herself and help others who are fellow suffers of BPD and a smorgasbord of other mental illnesses. Surmounting stigmas that would deter a more timid soul, Amanda Greene takes us through the cause and effect of a dysfunctional childhood with a mentally ill parent and her own coping mechanisms that were initially to her detriment.I underlined and bookmarked passages front to back that rang so true they must be revisited from time to time. I recommend the Kindle version so as to understand some of the charming "British informal" colloquialisms sprinkled throughout. 😊Amanda's journey toward self discovery and healing show a dogged determination that pitted her against many obstacles she would work tirelessly to surmount. Ultimately, "My Alien Self: My Journey Back to Me," is a triumph of the human spirit that chooses life, warts and all, over despair and defeat.

I very much enjoyed reading this memoir. It reminded me a lot of myself - except for all the exciting traveling. This book very clearly explained the symptoms of borderline personality disorder, and what life was actually like for Amanda while going through this. It was difficult for her at first, but she learned how to cope with her out-of-control emotions, anger, and OCD through various forms of therapy. Reading this has given me hope as a sufferer of BPD. It lets me know that maybe this pain WILL end and that there's a way out if I look for it. This has encouraged me to continue down the path I'm on, trying to recover using therapy and soul-searching. I understand from reading her account that it will be difficult, but at least I know now that it's possible. This is a MUST READ for anyone struggling with borderline personality disorder and thinking there is no way out. Amanda has shown that there is hope for people with mental health issues. I would recommend this book to anyone who has BPD or has loved one that does.

I loved reading this book so much that I finished it in three days, and afterwards, it left me wanting more! It is a book that is easily relate-able as many people have a mental illness or a friend or family member with one, and the fact that the story takes place throughout Amanda's life makes it a good read for most ages (I would say 8th grade and up due to some sexual content). This book is honest and truly captures the thoughts (including word-for-word diary entries) of someone with a mental illness.Reading this book has brought me comfort, as I suffer from various mental illnesses as well, and left me feeling like I am not so alone in this, and that recovery is possible. I liked that it was written in first person because it has that "story-telling" effect. I am going to tell my mom and friends to read it, because I believe that this book could give them a better understanding of how I feel and what it is like to live with a mental illness.

I initially downloaded this book because I am interested in psychology, different personality types and how people overcome life's difficulties. However, I am also a fellow sufferer of depression so I very much related on a personal level to many of the issues Amanda describes so eloquently and positively in her `alien journey.' What an interesting, fun and well written life story this is - I was engaged right from the start and couldn't put it down. Amanda's certainly packed a lot of exciting adventures into her life! Not only is the book very useful for those with Border Personality Disorder, OCD, anxiety and depression by describing the various treatments that Amanda has tried over the years, it also inspires hope, courage and a light at the end of the tunnel. I would thoroughly recommend this book not just to those suffering with mental health issues, but to those who would also like a jolly good read!

As a psychiatric nurse I found this book very helpful to my practice. Her life story helped me understand that my patients have a life story to how they got to where they are. I have my textbook stories on how to "talk" to my patients, but it taught me how to "talk" to the symptoms not the person. Amanda gave me insight on how to talk to the person.As for my personal life. Majority of my family have mental illnesses to various degrees. Some are hospitalized, some are not and should be. The struggle Amanda went through to accept her mother is a demon I am struggling with myself.I find this book a great discussion starter to reduce or even end stigma towards mental illness within yourself. This book really demonstrates that stigma towards mental illness is present in all of us and we can change it.

Brilliantly written memoir from a woman who's travelled widely, experienced many emotional ups and downs along the way, and has a pretty liberal mindset, which may not always have been to her advantage.Amanda has Borderline Personality Disorder and her sometimes tumultuous relationships reflect some of the difficulties she experiences - but the problems she faces are certainly not all of her making. Her mother was schizophrenic, making her relationship with her parents difficult, to say the least. The men in her life leave something to be desired.She makes some bad decisions and seems to be able to get money easily, charming her way into jobs, but then has difficulty keeping them, and spends money like water, so she's usually broke.It's a very interesting read, incredibly frank and honest, taking you down lots of different paths through her history of eating disorders and depression, medication, and therapies, as she tries to reconcile her past with her present and deal with difficult relationships.She was born the same year as me, so it's interesting to compare what I was doing while she was in Japan, or when I got married, etc. Her life certainly makes mine seem boring but safe. Very interesting read.

I am a psychiatrist and as such I do have a professional (as well as a personal) interest in personal/first-hand accounts of mental illness (or disorder) and not only professional or text-book descriptions. Of course over the years I have heard many patients/clients/service-users (choose whichever you prefer, I won’t enter the heated debates on which is the best term to use) talking about their experiences, but those have been mostly in response to specific questions, rather than their own preferred expressions or commentaries, and mostly at times of crisis.I have also read a number of more literary versions of mental illness (sometimes recommended by people I was working with, including patients, like Silvia Plath’s ‘The Bell Jar’, others I’ve discovered myself when reading some of my favourite writers: F. Scott Fitzgerald’s ‘The Crack-Up’ or Virginia Woolf’s ‘Mrs Dalloway’). They are great works by fantastic writers and well-worth a read, even if the subject of mental health is not close to your heart.What Ms. Green’s book provides is not only an account of a mental disorder sufferer (despite the diagnostic difficulties that as she observes plague the field), but a memoir of her life, her quest for finding her true self and the process of her re-discovery. And her life is far from boring. Travelling far and wide (across the UK, Spain, Japan, Australia, Borneo…), with interests as varied as the creation and management of websites, property development, Orangutan, the entertainment industry…dabbling in drugs and alcohol, complicated family relationships and a difficult love life, Ms. Green’s account is gripping stuff in its own right. And her writing expresses well the ups and downs and the subjective nature of the narration.Having worked as a psychiatrist in the NHS (National Health Service in the UK, the same one the author seeks help from) I can see things from a professional perspective (and although the system tries hard to avoid the ‘us and them’ dichotomy it’s not easy). I fully understand why she might not have received more intense help before. Mental Health Services struggle to provide support and care for people who cannot cope even on a basic level and who present an immediate and major risk to self (people repeatedly attempting suicide, severe self-harm or severely neglecting themselves) or others (threatening to harm others or doing so) for lengthy periods of time. It is less than an ideal situation; the services are stretched to the limit and mostly dealing with crises, but that is a true reflection of affairs. There is hope that service-user led movements and the voluntary sector will help to fill in the gaps, but prioritising is difficult.The nature and characteristics of Borderline Personality Disorder with its difficulties in trusting people, impulsivity and inconsistent engagement (well reflected in ‘My Alien Self’) cause problems of its own not easily managed by the psychiatric services as they are currently set.The author of ‘My Alien Self’ has managed to find herself, to create her own combination of therapies (learned over the years, including mindfulness, CBT, CAT, yoga, medication…) and more importantly she has had the courage to go through her life, collecting and reliving her experiences and having a hard look at her past, the most difficult part of any therapy.‘My Alien Self’ is a book difficult to read for anybody with mental health issues and also for professionals, but precisely because of that it’s a book that needs to be read. I salute Ms. Green for her guts and congratulate her for her achievements. And I agree with her. It is a battle that has to be fought every day, but I’m sure she’ll win the war.

I finished reading this book exactly one month ago. I find it really difficult to review a book that is, essentially, the story of another persons life. For this reason I have taken some time to try and strike a balance between the story and its presentation, which I truly hope I have managed to do.The story is a no-holds-barred, this is me, account of a life packed with extremes. On many occasions I found myself actively disliking the writer. When it first happened I took a cup of coffee into my garden and thought about what I was feeling. I've undergone Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and it's good to discover why we feel the way we do instead of just reacting. My conclusion was that the author didn't like herself, at that point in her life, and I was feeling what she had felt.I am in awe of Amanda's courage in writing this book and there were many times when she could have been describing me. For this reason I totally agree with Amanda's wanting to change the way mental illness is viewed and this leads to the presentation of the book.I have long held the belief that mental illness is simply the way an individual mind deals with the realities of life. Society wants to file everything into neat little boxes, which in turn complicates things even more. However, I really believe that any approach to this subject is better left to after the personal story.I actually skipped over parts that, to be brutally honest, felt a bit 'preachy' to continue the story. These parts of the book are, I feel, as important to Amanda as her personal journey and it would be a shame for them to be overlooked as they do contain an awful lot of really important information. This, I believe, is where there needs to be some serious editing; if only to separate the life that was from the life that is.

I had been itching to read this book for such a long time and when life finally allowed me the time to do so I wasn't disappointed with what I found!Amanda has certainly led a full and varied life and there were many parts of this memoir which I could resonate with, drawing parallels with my own life experiences. There were other instances which simply intrigued and fascinated me and frankly left me in awe.The underlying purpose of this memoir is to raise awareness of Borderline Personality Disorder, what it means, how it affects sufferers' lives (and those around them), and what treatments are available. It follows Amanda's very own journey from the first indications that something wasn't quite right, to the realisation that actually there is a name for this disorder, and then her treatment and care plan following her route to recovery and finding her true self. Like any memoir, it has some very dark moments, but there are also some very positive and uplifting moments, especially when Amanda documents the changes she can see in herself during CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). This book is not only an inspirational life story it is also very educational and insightful. We can all read information on the Internet about mental health issues and treatments, but it's a completely different thing to read the raw and honest life story of a sufferer who is baring her soul, brave enough to confront a subject which is full of stigma and often taboo. With more people like Amanda in this world willing to reveal all to those who care to listen, a greater awareness is inevitable. I salute her for her courage and determination.Putting the mental health issues aside, this memoir is a fabulous story of relationships (both romantic and family), risk taking, ambitions, determination to succeed, and well... a woman's journey and how to cope with and overcome life's trials.I found Amanda's writing style refreshing. Most of the time it felt like she was talking to me, friend to friend. Also, drawing extracts from diaries she had kept over the years was a nice touch. She writes expressively, clearly and methodically. Very well done and highly recommended.I am so impressed with this book that I have already downloaded her sequel, "39", which will bring me up to date on the progress of her recovery.

I downloaded this book to read, as I have always been interested in mental health and how the brain works, and also have had members of my own family suffer from similar conditions. I also worked in the mental health sector for a short period of time so was intrigued to read about someone who not only suffered from mental health illness, but actually wrote a book about her life and what she went through to over come it.This story is a must read for any one who has or is still suffering from mental illness, or have family members going through this to try and help and understand them and the stigma that surrounds mental illness. I could not put this book down from the first time I picked it up, I admire Amanda for her honesty to her illness and are totally amazed by what she achieved in her life with her jobs and her travelling to 21 country's by the time she was 22, all this while suffering from BPD, anxiety and OCD.What a amazing rollercoaster of a journey I was taken on through Amanda Greens life! It was moving, exciting, sad, funny, endearing and most of all inspiring. Even if metal illness has not touch you or others in your life this is a brilliant read, and maybe it will just make you help or understand someone who is going through this illness.